I am a Sarawak Blogger

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Relationship "Rules" Every Couple Should Break

Whether you consider yourself to be a "rule breaker"
or not,  sometimes you've just got to break the rules and
when it comes to your relationship, it's often a really
good idea.

The fact is, we all live by a set of rules. We may not call

them that or even be aware of what these rules are most
of the time.

So what rules are we talking about and why "Should" we

break them?

We're talking about the "rules"  that you, us and everyone

else lives in every moment of our lives.

These rules that we're talking about could include

ideas and beliefs that your parents either preached about
or showed you by example and you adopted even though
 you may not have realized it.

Also, these rules are the beliefs that society subtly (and
sometimes not so subtly) says you should or shouldn't
do.

These rules that you live by (often unconsciously) act as

the rudder or guide for what you will or won't do in your life.

In fact, most of the rules we live by in our relationships and

marriages actually keep us from having all the love and
passion that is possible for us instead of giving us more.

You know the ones we're talking about...


You have them in your own life if you think about them.


Things like "Marriage is hard so just make the best of it,"

"It's your duty as a woman so lie down and get through
it the best way you can," or our favorite "Passion dies after
a few years of being together so don't expect it to last very
long."

Wow--even though you may not have those specific

beliefs, we're guessing that you have some beliefs and
rules that hold you back from experiencing your best
life and relationships possible.

Here are 5 rules that we love to break so we can

keep passion alive in our relationship (and we urge
you to break them often too!)....

#1 Rule to Break:

Spending TOO much time together is bad for you.

We happen to be business partners as well as married

and we usually spend 24 hours a day with one another--
give or take a few hours.
 In this kind of situation, there's a lot of advice out there
that suggests NOT to spend that much time with one
another--that too much time together will destroy the
mystery and excitement.

For us, it's just the opposite. The more time we spend

with one another, the deeper our connection grows.

We realize that not everyone has chosen to work

together as a couple but even if you haven't, make
sure that you spend quality time together.

Find things you both like to do and then do them

together--and enjoy each other.

#2 Rule to Break:

Not allowing yourself to be vulnerable and totally
honest about who you are

This is one of the biggest unspoken relationship rules

we seen demonstrated and passed down generation
to generation.

It's the one that says, "If you've been hurt before, don't

open yourself to anyone else. Keep a part of yourself
private and don't allow yourself to ever be vulnerable
like that again."

While we know that it's not easy to open to another

after you've been in pain, if you're holding back a
part of yourself, you're also holding back love.

And that withholding of love can only increase the

feeling of distance and separation between the two
of you.

This withholding shows up in our communication

with one another. If you want some really
practical ideas on how to start being honest about
who you are and opening your heart to more love.



#3 Rule to Break:


Romance, passion and intimacy should happen

spontaneously.

The fear behind this rule is that planning for passion

leads to boredom in a relationship.

There's the belief that for passion to be exciting,

you have to always be spontaneous--that if you
take out the mystery and surprise, you'll both
get bored.

While this may be true for some people, we've

found that the opposite is true for most of us.

The truth is that when you make passion a

regular part of your life, the juice between the
two of you just increases.

The author Malcolm Gladwell said that you can

become an expert on anything by doing it for
10,000 hours.

Now we're not saying that you have to spend

10,000 hours in the throes of passion to get
good at it but we are saying that it can increase
instead of decrease if you make passion more a part
of your life.

And you do that by planning it--because if you

don't, you know as well as we do that life will
get in the way and it won't happen.

So break this rule and deepen your connection

and passion with each other.

#4 Rule to Break:

No touching or shows of intimacy in public

How many couples do you see holding hands

when they walk or sitting in a restaurant?

Not many, right?


For some reason, it seems to go against the

grain to show even innocent signs of affection
in public--even though it's one of the things
that can help keep your passion and
connection going.

Even though relationship advice articles in

women's magazines encourage what we'll
call light-weight public displays of affection--
(holding hands, sitting close, putting your
arm around your partner)--for people in
relationships of many years...

People just don't do it.


Whether they don't think they have to "try"

that hard, they think "we're not teenagers
anymore" or there are too many old grievances
between the two of them to allow themselves
to show this kind of love and affection...

They don't do it.


We suggest you take the plunge and go out

on a limb. Break this rule and reach for your
partner's hand the next time you're out. See
what happens.

#5 Rule to Break:

You don't have to treat your partner with
respect after being together for a few years

If there's one thing we see as we observe other

couples, it's that as time goes on, there's a
tendency to forget about respecting each other
and they take each other for granted.

This lack of respect can come in the form of

not acknowledging one another when one
person returns home after being away.

It can come in the form of allowing the

interruption of a telephone call, email or
Facebook to take precedence over
listening to your partner when he or she
talks to you.

Or it can come in the form of using unkind

words to your partner when kind words would
work just as well.

If you want passion to grow, you have to start

respecting each other.

Take a moment now and look at your interactions

with your partner to see where you might be
more loving and respectful of him or her.

Being the rule breakers that we are, we urge

you to join us in breaking these relationship
rules.

If you want more passion that last for years

to come, start now.



Thursday, November 25, 2010

Dasyatnya Doa Seorang Ibu


Ibu Kita dan Kita Sebagai Ibu 
 ni saya dapat dari rakan blogger dan di kongsi bersama rakan2 dan sanak saudara sebagai panduan kita.
 
q
      Lapangnya masa kita ada kaitan dengan keberkatan hidup kita.  Kita adalah di bawah siksa Allah bilamasa ada masa untuk buat benda tak baik tapi takdak masa nak buat yang baik

q
      Jika kita tak pernah kecukupan duit maksudnya kita disiksa Allah

q
      *** Setitik air mata ibu jatuh, 10 kebajikan anak hilang so ibu2 jangan jatuh air mata ye and anak jangan bagi ibu jatuh air mata.  Menangis kerana anak berjaya dan bukan sedih
kerana angkara anak

q
      Kalau balik tengah malam, buka lampu tengok dan tatap muka ibu, sebab wajah orang tidur akan menampakkan segalanya

q
      Ada 3 mata yang tak dijilat api neraka
Ø
      Melihat kaabah sehingga menitis air mata
Ø
      Membaca quran sehingga menitis air mata
Ø
      Memandang wajah ibu yg sedar tidur / sedar hingga berlinang air mata

q
      3 orang yg kita kena tengok dan selalu pandang dalam hidup, tengok masa tidor!
Ø
      Anak
Ø
      Ibu
Ø
     Suami
Selingan: kata ustaz kalau kita ada perselisih faham dgn suami sampai nak bercerai, tgk laa muka bila dia tidor kalau masih terbit perasan kasih, saying, cinta, rindu atau simpati, janganlah bercerai tapi jika tiada rasa tu semua maksudnya jodoh dah memang takde, boleh proceed pi mahkamah
J


q
      Orang yang selalu menatap and memandang ibunya takkan menangis di hari kematian ibunya… kira tak menangis teruk laa..Bagi siapa yg masih ada ibu, pandang laa selalu

q
      Adalah menjadi satu dosa jika kita mengguna jari telunjuk untuk menunjukkan sesuatu pada ibu

q
      Kalau ada niat yang baik teruskan laa..Allah akan bersama, jangan takut

q
      Kalau tak mampu lakukan sesuatu, pasang niat pun mencukupi e.g. tak mampu tolong org, niat nak tolong pun dah memadai

q
      *** Kalau kita tak mampu letakkan diri kita di tempat yang terbaik, Allah akan letakkan kita di tempat terbaik dengan syarat letakan ibu kitadi tempat yang terbaik

q
      Ada kaedah yang mana kita boleh minta pada Allah, “ungkit” kebaikan yang menimpa dengan tujuan untuk makbulkan doa kita.  Kaedah tu dipanggil “wasilah amal”
Ø
       “Ya Allah semalam aku sudah bersedekah sebanyak RM1, kalau itu satu kebaikan jadikanlah ia penyebab makbulnya doaku ini”
Ø
      *** Paling banyak buat baik dengan ibu kita, lagi mustajab.  Makna dia wasilah amal ni sangat berkesan kalau yg dituntut tadi adalah hal hal yang berkaitan kebaikan yang dibuat kepada ibu kita
Ø
      Tapi geng kalau sedekah RM1 takkan nak tuntutkan J

q
      Antara lain yang boleh dituntut adalah apabila kita ditimpa sakit/musibah

q
      Kalau ditimpa sakit, baca laa Innalillahiwainnaillaihirojjiun,,, then cakap dengan Allah
Ø
      “Ya Allah, berilah pahala besar untuk sakit yang aku tanggung ini”
Ø
      “Ya Allah, bagilah aku keampunan dosa atas sakit ku ini”
Even suapkan anak pun kita boleh tuntut, apatah lagi sedekah kepada ibu dan orang yang memerlukkan.  


q
      *** Barang siapa yang tidak mendoakan ibu selepas sembahyang buat ibu yang sudah meninggal maka dikira dia anak derhakawalaupun pada waktu ibunya hidup dia tak pernah menderhaka.  Maksudnya jika ibu masih hidup atau telah tiada, selepas setiap solat kita mesti doakannya!

q
      Doa orang yang masih hidup makbul untuk orang yang hidup dan mati.  Jadi doakan ibu kita telah tiada!

q
      *** Doa orang yang mati makbul untuk orang yang masih hidup
Ø
      Masa ni ustaz tu bagi contoh sadis sket..sedeh gak laa.. pi ke pusara mak kita cakap..“Mak, esok anak saya nak kawin, kalau mak ada tentu mak bahagia engok cucu mak kawinkan”  atau “bapa saya nak kawin esok, kalau bapa ada, pasti bapa akan gembira tengok sayakan..”  Ustaz kata luahkan kepada ibu/bapa yang telah tiada kerana mereka mendengar dan mereka boleh mendoakan kita dari sana.

q
      Bila lalu kubur, perlahankan dan beri salam!  Mereka akan doakan kita “berkatilah si A ini” dan jika tak bagi salam, mereka akan kata “celakahlah orang ini”  Jadi, jangan lupa bagi salam next time

q
      Tanda tanda siksa Allah atas muka bumi ni antara lain simpan harta sampai mati tak pernah keluarkan

q
      Sesiapa yang bersedekah selalu, takkan miskin orang itu selamanya..

q
      Bila nak berbelanja @ shopping always spare duit untuk sedekah kerana dalam duit kita tu ada hak org susah.  Jadi bila orang buta datang masa makan, bagi laa duit sebab kita nak cari org susah untuk sedekah dah amat susah masa sekrg and takde masa jadi Allah hantarkan org2 susah ini untuk kita dapatkan pahala!

q
      *** Jika mak kita sudah meninggal dan semasa hayatnya kita ada peruntukkan wang untuk dia, bila mak kita dah takde teruskan memberi peruntukkan tu sebagai sedekah.  Jangan kurangkan peruntukkan!! “Ya Allah, aku sedekahkan bagi pihak ibuku, semoga pahala sedekah ni sampai kepada ibuku”.  Itu yang yang buat ibu kita bahagia di sana.

q
      Kalau kita susah nak bersedekah, bayangkan wajah ibu kita baru kita ringan tangan nak bersedekah

q
      *** Allah panjangkan usia ibu dan bapa supaya dia sakit dan nyanyukuntuk beri syurga pada anak anaknya.  Jagalah mereka dengan baik insyallah, syurga balasanya.  Jadi kalau tahu ibu/bapa sakit, berebutlah menjaga ibu/bapa kita.  Besar sangat pahalanya.

q
      Allah kalau boleh taknak kita masuk neraka jadi Allah takkan matikan seseorang dalam keadaan kotor dan berdosa jadi dia bagi kita sakit/malu/miskin untuk membersihkan kita sebelum dia mengambil kita

Selalu Bergaduh Dengan Ibu

q
      Jika ada antara kita yang selalu bergaduh dengan ibu, ada kemungkinan kita diganggu saka
Ø
      Antara ganguan saka, selalu mimpi bayi/budak.  Dukung bayi, susu bayi or selalu mimpi jatuh dari tempat tinggi/ selalu sakit tulang belakang/ tulang belakang bengkok/ rasa mengantuk selepas asar
Ø
      Saka dipindahkan melalui Kasih saying/ Harta pusaka, walaupun sebiji pinggan / Amalan / Sentuhan
Ø
      Symptom dah terkena saka
v
     Tak boleh tidor lena tapi bila dekat azan subuh, senang lena
v
     Bila dah peringakat teruk, di usia tua kita, tgh malam selalu lapar
v
     Susah nak dapat anak, senang gugur
v
     Ada rasa kelibat orang lalu
v
     Yang lagi parah, saka bersetubuh dgn kita, mengandung tapi anak hilang dalam kandungan jadi bila nak beintim, bercakap laa sedikit kerana saka menyerupai suami kita dan dia datang dalam keadaan diam
Ø
      Cara hilangkan saka, Zikir “Laillahaillalah” 700,000 sampai habis, insyallah saka akan cair dan keluar dari badan

q
      Antara penyakit saka adalah breast cancer, cancer rahim and cancer tulang.

q
      3 penyakit yang tiada ubat yang penyakitnya adalah datang dari syaitan adalah cancer, aids and leukemia.  Kalau dapat ni pi laa perawatan cara islam jugak.

q
      Kalau ibu kita sakit cancer dan dia tak mampu berzikir, kita tolong zikirkan

q
      Kalau ada penyakit was was, bacalah surah al-ikhlas.. “Qulhuwallahuahad…” 1000x sehari
Anak Lari Dari Rumah
q
      Kalau anak lari dari rumah, gantungkan bajunya dihanger dan anginkan dan hadiahkan surah al-ikhlas setiap hari

q
      Masa lauangan azan yang pertama, panggilah nama anak kita, insyallah akan sampai panggilan kita kepadanya
Anak Degil
q
      *** Bila anak dah tidor, duduk di hujung kepala pangil ROH ANAK
Ø
      Ni seram sket masa nak buat hehehe..mula2 je lepas tu ok..e.g. Wahai roh anakku "nama anak", jadilah kamu roh yang baik, roh yang bertimbang rasa pada ibu dan bapa, roh yang taat pada Allah, roh yang sayang sesama manusia



Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Cerita Zaman Kuno Di Jepun

Kuno Jepun Mudah2an dapat diambil hikmahnya..(dari buku cerita Zaman Kuno)
Konon pada jaman dahulu, di Jepun ada semacam kebiasaan untuk membuang orang lanjut usia ke hutan. Mereka yang sudah lemah tak berdaya dibawa ke tengah hutan yang lebat, dan selanjutnya tidak diketahui lagi nasibnya.

Alkisah ada seorang anak yang membawa orang tuanya (seorang wanita tua) ke hutan untuk dibuang. Ibu ini sudah sangat tua, dan tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa lagi. Si anak laki-laki ini menggendong ibu ini sampai ke tengah hutan. Selama dalam perjalanan, si ibu mematahkan ranting-ranting kecil. Setelah sampai di tengah hutan, si anak menurunkan ibu ini.
"Bu, kita sudah sampai",kata si anak. Ada perasaan sedih di hati si anak. Entah kenapa dia tega melakukannya.
Si ibu , dengan tatapan penuh kasih berkata:"Nak, Ibu sangat mengasihi dan mencintaimu. Sejak kamu kecil, Ibu memberikan semua kasih sayang dan cinta yang ibu miliki dengan tulus. Dan sampai detik ini pun kasih sayang dan cinta itu tidak berkurang.
Nak, Ibu tidak ingin kamu nanti pulang tersesat dan mendapat celaka di jalan. Makanya ibu tadi mematahkan ranting-ranting pohon, agar bisa kamu jadikan petunjuk jalan".
Demi mendengar kata-kata ibunya tadi, hancurlah hati si anak. Dia peluk ibunya erat-erat sambil menangis. Dia membawa kembali ibunya pulang, dan ,merawatnya dengan baik sampai ibunya meninggal dunia.

Mungkin cerita diatas hanya dongeng. Tapi di jaman sekarang, tak sedikit kita jumpai kejadian yang mirip cerita diatas. Banyak manula yang terabaikan, entah karena anak-anaknya sibuk bisnis dll.Orang tua terpinggirkan, dan hidup kesepian hingga ajal tiba. kadang hanya dimasukkan panti jompo, dan ditengok jkalau ada waktu saja.

Kiranya cerita diatas bisa membuka mata hati kita, untuk bisa mencintai orang tua dan manula. Mereka justru butuh perhatian lebih dari kita, disaat mereka menunggu waktu dipanggil Tuhan yang maha kuasa. Ingatlah perjuangan mereka pada waktu mereka muda, membesarkan kita dengan penuh kasih sayang, membekali kita hingga menjadi seperti sekarang ini.


Cerita Renungan

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Memory in Japan Part 2

This part is continuing of my memory in Japan on my last post.Visiting Shiraito water fall, Ice cave and Larva Narusawa,Shibazakara in Fuji Mountain,Imperial Palace and Meiji shrine.{Please see the beautiful flower image below} During in Japan to complete thru visit we went to Shiraito Water Fall.It is very beautiful sceneries. The water comes out between the hills.We are free to came here but only paid for parking fee The fee are between 200-500yen only depend which place we choose.













Visiting the Imperial Palace and Meiji shrine.

A  nice place we visit Imperial palace I am happy to see a lot of nice  places, but the weather not so good. I like to see nice trees around. We  walk until we reach shrine. There we saw the Japanese pray,  worship   or what I am not sure too? Many tourist went to that place to see the  Japanese having their marriage ceremony there.




There  are a lot of shop around that area selling the branded cloth and jeans.  The area is very big and we can’t finish and we are all tired and  thought of going back to the hotel.
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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Memory in Japan


Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Work Progress 4th week the stick mark in red is our TM cable route







Here attached some more photos of construction progress.